Not My Place

14 Mar

I am the youngest of three children. I have two older brothers. Twins. So that means for the 24 years of my life, I have been a little princess! But what happens when a new female tries to step on the scene? Yes, thREADERS, I’m talking about my brothers’ new girlfriends.

My brothers are cute, and a lot of girls chased after them, so I figured that it was my duty as the little sister to weed out the bad ones, and I made sure I showed no mercy. It was my mission, and I chose to accept it… with pride. I mean mugged. I rolled my eyes. I ignored. There were sly remarks that chipped away at these girls’ confidence and amplified their insecurities. “You may be interested, but you’re not good enough.” I mean I was a beast. Don’t get mad men. This didn’t hurt my brothers dating life, but I had to let females know that if they wanted to get to my brothers, I wasn’t the avenue. My brothers knew this, so they may have had more girlfriends than I knew about and never introduced me. Do I care? No. My job was not to seek out active victims but to be ready when duty called.

But as time moved on, we all got older. I would say I felt the wrath of my actions when I dated guys, but I’ve only dated guys who were an only child or had brothers. My maturity in regards to my brothers’ relationships came on its own, and with that maturity came God’s test. This test happened about three years ago when my brother introduced me to his girlfriend… and I didn’t approve. Was I mean? No. Was I nice? No. I abstained. Which means I just said hi and refrained from any more conversation. He later found on his own that she was no good without help from me. I’d grown from that experience and realized that my brothers’ relationships are just that. Their relationships. All I had to do was take a step back, and time would reveal itself.

Which brings me to an incident a few weeks back. A curveball in my growth. My other brother has a new “girlfriend”, and he brought her to the house. I really believe that her expectation was that because she was the new girlfriend, I would jump to introduce myself and be extra friendly. WRONG! Honestly, I’m not friendly on a regular bases, and really do not feel that it is my job to be buddy buddy and best friends with her. I have enough friends, and she’s dating him. NOT ME. I owe her nothing, so her getting mad because I didn’t put on the friendly face gets a good ole Evelyn quote: “You Are A None Mother Fucking Factor!” I have things to do, and her mean mugs do not stop me from continuing with my business. I honestly don’t even know her name. The only reason I bring it up is because the said young lady said something to my brother about my unfriendliness and came back over yesterday with her mean mug on tight. It probably made her even madder when I continued folding clothes and disregarded her demeanor. I don’t have to like you. That’s not my place. You’re in a relationship with him not me. With my brothers’ taste, I probably won’t like you anyway, so move around!

Am I the only little sister/sibling that isn’t trying to be friends with my brothers’ girlfriends? I really want to tell females that it’s not that I don’t like them. I just have no concern and don’t want to waste the energy. This incident has really peaked my interest about how others handle their siblings significant others especially as adults. Let me know what you do and how you hand the situations.


Posted by on March 14, 2011 in Family, Relationships, Social Life


2 responses to “Not My Place

  1. Typo-Critical

    March 29, 2011 at 2:44 PM

    It’s kind of funny how I agree with this and how much we’re on the same page even though our roles are reversed (you’re the youngest sibling and a woman, I’m the oldest sibling and I’m a man). As an older brother, I definitely intend to do a “check test” whenever my younger sisters start bringing home boyfriends. I will give them the evil eye and a hard time. Chalk it up to my overprotectiveness…

    The hardest part about this whole thing is, if you speak on their relationships, that indirectly gives them license to speak on yours, too. Think about it: if you nag or aren’t polite or civil with their significant other, then they have due process to nag and not be polite or civil with your significant other. By no means at all does you being my sister’s boyfriend IMMEDIATELY entitle you to my nice side. But if my sister likes the dude and it seems he treats her right/makes her happy, I will aim for civility. I’ll tolerate you and, like you did above, pipeline, I’ll abstain instead of say anything.

  2. tavalava

    March 29, 2011 at 7:17 PM

    I am the same way with my brother. He’s younger then me so I’m already very protective. He introduces or brings them up to my parents before he will bring them up to me. Often times the girls just aren’t good enough for him and I know they won’t last so I have no problem being cold to them. When I do meet them, I give them the third degree asking just about everything except their blood type. I do it not only to scare them and let them know that I don’t play, but also to let them know that they’ve got another thing coming if they think they’re going to woo and sneak up into our nuclear family.


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