Good Ass Job: A Toast to the “Sellouts”

24 Mar

People do indeed make the world go round. They shape the world, make decisions that affect the world, and impose values that change the world…. for better or for worse.

In a previous King’s Law entry I discussed how we allow others to impose illusions of opportunity upon us within our careers, just to make our jobs harder (or seemingly so). We continue to deal with it in order to afford ourselves the thing’s that our hearts desire.

Sadly, we know that most of us will never have everything that we want. We’ll end up prioritizing what is most important, and making deals to “get the most, not the lesser” (Pimp C).

At the end of the last blog I stated that we should define what makes us happy and live for it… conversely because you can’t always get what you want…

KING’S LAW: Be ready to name your price…

Going back to my conundrum from that day… What would make me feel as if cutting my hair was a suitable course of action? My one answer is “if I had a Good Ass Job, I’d do it.” So let’s discuss this…

Good Ass Job (n.)
A position of gainful employment that compensates you for purchases, changes, or sacrifices necessary in order to fit behavioral and aesthetic standards of your employer.

The Good Ass Job is the urban myth that is preached to the congregation of grade schools around the nation. The Good News tells us that if you go to college, there will be a Good Ass Job waiting for you when you graduate (so that you can pay back Sallie Mae). Unfortunately, the setting of the story changed in the last decade… Finding a Good Ass Job is like finding a leprechaun at the far end of the rainbow.

For those of us who do find it, we’ll gladly do what we need to in order to fit the corporate image…. frequent haircuts (stylings), better-than-average-quality clothing, learning to golf, attending after-work socials, and whole list of small things that aren’t difficult to do even if we’d rather not do it.

Soon you will notice the difference between you and your friends who are unable to attain a Good Ass Job, and instead just have… jobs.





What’s worse is that it’s hard to even understand why somebody would want to be a in career… that word almost sounds like “trap”…

But if that trap is going to afford me the ability to eat what I want, buy what I want, and live how I want… what’s so wrong with feeling trapped? I assume being married to a Good Ass Job is easier than being married in real life.

However, instead of a Good Ass Job, the majority of us are stuck with jobs posing a Good Ass Jobs… asking you to meet non-required expectations in order to carry the illusion of upward mobility. And even if that mobility is granted, best believe that your freedom is the price that you’ll pay for it. You will be able to afford a vacation, but you won’t be able to take one. You will be able to afford to eat what you want, but the restaurants will be closed by the time you get off. You will be able to buy what you want, but you won’t have the time to enjoy it.

I tried to play along with the notion that these silly and irrelevant gestures of professionalism would help me… and when my manager announced my wage increase to me, it was a whopping $0.20165/hr… $419.43 for the year… *Shows my “WTF Face”*

Think about what other intangible pieces of your being and/or existence and/or your happiness that you forfeit just to be (un)happy with your job… is it really worth it? is it considered selling out? selling your soul?

Meh… I can’t say that much. All I know is i spend an Hour and a Half commuting to and from work 5 days a week. I’m at my job-place for 9+ hours out of the day. So roughly 10-11 hours in a 24 hour period are spoken for to something that I’m required to do even though I’d prefer not to. If you’re attempting to live a well-rested healthy life (8 hours nightly), you only have at most 6 hours to do miscellaneous things such as eat, shower, work out, communicate with close friends, play Black Ops… etc.

However, in my opinion 6 hours is not enough time to do everything we would like… and in truth, the amount of time it takes you to get ready for work in the morning is taken out of this 6 hours. So what do we do? We miss out on sleep to be able to enjoy our lives outside of work, because we certainly don’t enjoy life at work.

What is it that we’re actually doing all of this for again? I get confused somewhere in between fighting the urge to continually snooze my alarm in the morning and pretending to do office-busy-work when I’m really posting a blog… o_O

The least we can ask is that the activity that takes up the majority of our “living time” (time not spent sleeping) is something we can continue to do without wanting to choke out every muthafucka in this bitch with a better looking paycheck and/or a smile on their face because they can be happy at work being upset. But that’s really not how the job shit works.

I guess I’m doomed to be anti-establishment, and thus will never taste the sweet nectar of a Good Ass Job paycheck… but it’s all good… There’s a plan for that.

KING’S LAW: If the party ain’t crackin’, commence the jackin’!!! (Brandan Jackson)

I will continue to pretend enjoying my job. I will keep smiling in the face of the people who make my day more trying. I will be patient and wait for the next opportunity for upward mobility…. and if all else fails… I’mma rob some muthafuckas.


PS – Fuck a haircut or a shirt and tie… and tell them King T said that…. but I’ll take it back and apologize for a promotion.

1 Comment

Posted by on March 24, 2011 in Philosophy


One response to “Good Ass Job: A Toast to the “Sellouts”

  1. MichaelYoungHistory

    April 4, 2011 at 7:06 AM

    The real world man…SMH


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