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Strictly platonic???

22 Aug

So, I have this secret addiction to craigslist.

I don’t really like to talk about it, but I get a bit of a thrill buying and selling things on craigslist, looking for cool apartments and homes in every part of the country, and the haiku hotel. I read the “best of craigslist” postings for a laugh and of course, on the seedier side of the website, there’s the “personals”. Casual Encounters is pretty self-explanatory, Missed Connections brings out my deep-seated romantic at times, and then there’s the seeking part of the program. The most confusing thing I have run across on the interwebz has to be the “strictly platonic” area. No one seems to know what this section means. With people looking for everything from a “texting friend” to a “NAKED PRAYER BUDDY” (more about this later), everyone’s definition of platonic seems to vary.

Whether on the internet or in real life, what is a platonic relationship and is it possible for a m4w/w4m (as well as a situation with a m4m/m4m or w4w/w4w) to work long-term?

I was really confused by a few of the posts I found. Who answers these?

this guy is so sexually confused. what does he want?

I don't even know where to start here...

What's the gift card thing about?

gold digging for friendship...smh...

Mixed in with these are random lunch, movie and texting invites. Everyone wants some kind of human interaction, but what are the conditions?

Here are my rules for the platonic relationship I am currently looking for:

1. We can’t have ever dated, hooked up, almost hooked up, talked about how we would have hooked up in different circumstances, liked each other “like that”, confessed a crush (even on a drunken night), “talked” or any variation of the above.

2. We must find each other good looking enough to hang around constantly (I like to look at a handsome guy while I’m watching poorly written action movies, sue me) but not be so physically attractive to ruin the platonic potential.

3. We must have similar social interests, but vary in opinion (related to politics, sports, music, etc.) and career paths. I like to argue and need someone to learn cool stuff from. I hope you majored in art history, engineering or accounting. I don’t know anything about any of those.

4. You can’t have a dumb broad for a girlfriend that doesn’t like our relationship. I don’t do jealousy, ignorance, or jealous, ignant hussies. I promise to return the favor.

5. Our friendship has no gimmicks, no power trips, no ulterior motives. We never keep tabs on who won the last fight, who owes who $5 from the last time out, and we don’t keep secrets. Our loyalty and longevity are what defines us. Nothing else matters.

All others need not apply.

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4 Comments

Posted by on August 22, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , ,

4 responses to “Strictly platonic???

  1. MichaelYoungHistory

    August 24, 2011 at 9:07 AM

    “We must find each other good looking enough to hang around constantly (I like to look at a handsome guy while I’m watching poorly written action movies, sue me) but not be so physically attractive to ruin the platonic potential.” <——LMAO!

    I was gonna apply, but CLEARLY i don't fit the criteria!

     
    • MichaelYoungHistory

      August 24, 2011 at 9:08 AM

      licks finger, puts on butt, sizzle sound

       
  2. justinfication

    September 7, 2011 at 8:43 PM

    Why am I just now reading this? Great post!

    LOL @MYH “I was gunna apply”

     

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