Author Archives: justinfication

About justinfication

I was raised with no allowance: I recall asking my parents for an allowance for doing my chores. I thought that since Doug Funny got an allowance for cutting the grass,I should too. My parents laughed, at first, and then scolded me for bringing up the idea...and I never asked again. I was raised to turn the other cheek, but beat the hell out of anyone who touches my sisters. I was raised with, "That's enough sugar, Justin" I was raised with one pair of tennis shoes per school year. I was raised with Bugle Boy Jeans. I was raised on Christmas presents based on need, rather than want. I was raised on not being allowed to watch "The Simpsons" I was raised on a bag of Shipley's donut holes every first day of school. I was raised to stand up to greet a woman. I was raised to not even think about asking for a $4 hot dog at a ball game, "cause we have food at home" I was raised on Luann Platters, when mom decided not to cook. I was raised to (at least) rinse off my plate after dinner. I was raised with "Yes what? [m'am]" I was raised to iron my clothes the night before. I was raised to get to places on time. I was raised with well-done [no pink or it's going back] I was raised with understanding that a du-rag is an "in-house" accessory. I was raised with the currency of respect. I was raised with "no 9.79FM on Sundays"

Tribute to the 5 Most Sympathetic Cartoon Characters from My Childhood

[Prologue: In leiu of the current cartoon character trend on Facebook to protest child abuse…]

Is it too much for a kid to want a happy-ending?

All kids expect happy endings. And kids will go out of their way to get closure on a storyline — especially when the kid relates to or admires a character. When I was a kid, there were just some characters that I rooted for all the time—because they seemed to never ‘win’. Cartoonists definitely knew how to pull the heart-strings of lil’ kids, and I fell into their sentimental traps every time.

I don’t believe in prosperity gospel, but in the case of cartoons and ‘feel-good’ movies, I wanted the characters I rooted for to ‘win’ all the time. As horrible as it was, I forced myself to watch Aladdin: Prince of Thieves because I had to see Aladdin marry Jasmine, and I wanted to know who Aladdin’s father was too [oops, spoiler alert].

This post may seem bitter, but I assure you I am over it. My childhood; however, is still holding a grudge.

[Note: Youtube links don’t all work on blog page, so click to watch on Youtube!]

5. Doug Funny
Alright, Doug didn’t have it THAT bad. But I had to root for this kid.
Doug Funny
He had a long-time crush on Patti Mayonaisse, even though nothing developed there. I wouldn’t really say that Patti reciprocated her feelings but the storyline definitely led us all to hope that she would eventually turn around.

Continue on to Top 4…


Posted by on December 6, 2010 in Random


The Good, The Bad, & the Ugly when partying with The Grown & Sexy

Why is it so hard to have a good time sometimes?

Going out isn’t as fun as it could be, IMO.

And I could sit up here and act like I’m self-sufficient, like I’m above going to parties and say, “I don’t need to party…I can have fun all by myself”. But that’s not me.

The purpose of this post is to analyze, review, and call out the practices that I have witnessed, rebuked, and yes….even indulged in myself at the club.

If you go to bed every Friday at 10PM, then disregard this post
(Not that there’s anything wrong with that)
If you watch Saturday Night Live – when it’s live, then I’m not talking to you.
(Not that there’s anything wrong with that)
If you prefer to have a Red Box/Blockbuster Night every weekend with a significant other, then press play.

This is for the socialites.

First of all, I love my culture. We definitely know how to party and have a good time. In a way, I imagine every culture could say could that. And by ‘my culture’ and ‘we’, I’m referring to African Diaspora-influenced festivities; i.e. Hip-Hop, R&B, Adult Urban Contemporary, etc. So if you can relate or appreciate, don’t feel that I’m necessarily talking to one color here.

Now that I got my disclaimers out of the way, let me go in.

1. Dress

The Grown & Sexy crowds definitely know how to dress up. You got to look like money. It’s all about looking good and feeling good, right? A good rule of thumb whenever you step outside the house.

We’re just products of our culture, like anyone else. We do and dress like we see in the videos.  Nothing new there.

Dresscode is usually strictly enforced at G&S parties. Dresscode is also used to deter the “urban-casual” crowd. [yep, I’ll real PC]. I.E. No white-tees. No baggy pants. No Tennis. No baseball caps. More on this later. Dresscode is used as a filter to attract a certain ‘money-spending’ crowd to a party.

This doesn’t necessarily mean that a thug can’t dress like Carlton Banks and bring his beef to the party…

Nor does it stop a dude with a chip on his shoulder from private school to think he runs things for once in his life. But it filters the drama that many clubowners/promoters try to avoid.

Not that your character deserves to be judged based on your dress, but I think we all understand the concept of dresscode. I think…

[Digression: Discrimination is out there. And it’s not always at the clubs with non-black owners. I have personally witnessed dudes get turned around because of subjective discretion of how ‘baggy’ their pants are. And I don’t think there should be a difference between a black guy wearing a hoody who can’t get in and a white guy wearing a hoody who can get in. I’ve seen heavy-set dudes get turned around for having jeans too baggy. His jeans were quite tight especially around his thighs, but baggy around his calf. Was he suppose to wear skinny jeans for the big & tall? I’m calling you out, Austin’s Pure Night Club!]

And with the hipster culture being more embraced, we seem to be ‘evolving’ from our 2004 Usher-like blazers to  V-neck tees and cardigans being Grown & Sexy acceptable. Its cool to be casual, yet fancy.

I can only speak for the fellas here mostly. Ladies know how to look good.

I could comment on my thoughts on how folks dress, but that’s not my intention, nor area of expertise.

2. Music

Historical fact: Music sets the mood .

Matter of fact,  it REALLY sets the mood. We respond to music like no other. How many times have you seen an old school ballad have everyone sangin’? How many times have you seen a hit song hype everyone to go to the dance floor? How many times have you seen a Lil’ Jon song start a fight? How many times have you seen thirsties pep up on the dance floor once Juvenile [and you already know which song] comes on?
Continue Reading…


Posted by on November 23, 2010 in Social Life

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