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Category Archives: For The Ladies

How My Audition for the Twerk Team Went!

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I am probably the most militant (maybe second after Chad) person on the thread, so it really hurt me to think of this post… but it had to happen. I’ve lived in LA for about 9 and a half months now. It’s been an interesting adventure. There have been a lot of ups and downs during this journey as I’m in a very interesting situation. Right now, I am my boss’s only employee, so it’s been kind of hard meeting peers. And after the week I had, I decided to write this blog.

While trying to meet new people, I have realized that black women are the unfriendliest women (at least in LA). As I’ve had many encounters here, I’ve been surprised how various women have responded to me. I have a friend from college that I’ve been hanging out with. She’s friendly. She’s spunky. She’s accepting, and she’s white… So we go to a lot of bars and have wine nights watching Pitch Perfect. But being who I am, I can say I do crave [doing hoodrat things] with my friends, so I did go on a search to find some black friends. What did I decide to do? I joined the LA Urban League Young Professionals.

I went to my first event this past week. I was excited. I have a magnetic personality. I’m funny. I have to meet one friend, right? As I lightly campaigned about just moving here and made small talk, every single female ended up giving me the “we already have our friends leave us alone” stank face. I would join conversations, and these females would literally turn their lip up at me. Really? It wasn’t even about bourgie black people perceiving that I was less than because I clearly just paid dues. So why look at me like this? My jokes were funny. I even had the comedian laughing, so I questioned why I left the event feeling awkward, bruised, and empty handed.

The next night… I go out with my spunky, LA best friend, and a couple of her ex co-workers (one Caucasian, one Asian-American). We hit a nice, dance infused, spot. Mostly black people. I got to shake my lovely lady lump. The downside of this place? It was the upstairs of a restaurant and only had one, unisex bathroom. If you know me, you know that I am the bathroom queen and probably will go 3 or 4 times during the night. (It’s probably because I drink so fast… don’t judge me!) While in this abyss of a restroom line, a Latina taps me and tells me how pretty I look in my shirt. We then strike up a conversation. She recognizes my accent, and I tell her that I haven’t lived here for long. She then invites me out to a comedy night. We exchange numbers. (She was in line with her boyfriends, so she wasn’t hitting on me). A simple bathroom trip, and I gain an associate. Interesting.

I wish I had some profound logic as to why black women are the way we are, but I don’t. We get in our groups, and we treat encounters like they are twerk team auditions. I’m not being a pot calling the kettle black, but I am now aware of what we as black women do. And if we do it to women, many of us wonder why no men approached us at the club. We’re missing God’s blessing by being so unfriendly, so I’m challenging myself to smile at everyone and not give someone a stank face when they try to have a conversation with me. Let’s see what will happen! #BlackPower

-Warnecessary

 

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Gravity Night on Thread Radio: Think Like a Man

Hey thREADERS,

Here is our “Think Like a Man” episode. If you listened live, you will find the show (including the After Show) in its entirety. Once again, thank you all for your continued support. Join us for another show like only The Thread can do next Monday at 10PM Central. I hear 3 new Threaders will take the plunge into this “radio thing.” Much love! -23

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Thirteen Thursday Thoughts

Let’s go get ’em…

The value of American men is declining (1) according to this article I ran across the other day.

“According to Department of Education data, in 1975, men earned about 60 percent of all college degrees. By 1985, there was equal distribution by gender. But by 2009, the pendulum had swung in women’s favor. Of the more than 3 million college degrees for the Class of 2009, women earned close to 60 percent of those degrees (1,849,200), or almost 149 degrees for every 100 degrees earned by men. By 2017, Department of Education forecasts suggest that women will earn more than 160 degrees for every 100 earned by men.

The future isn’t rosy in the employment arena either. As recently as 2008, around 3 million more men than women had jobs, but that difference was closer to 1.5 million by the end of 2011 (having flirted with parity at the trough of the recession in 2009, at which time 82 percent of all job losses were male), according to Census and Bureau of Labor Statistics stats.”

Well, isn’t that just peachy? You can look at this one of two ways. On one hand, women are making significant progress in society. On the other hand, men ought to get used to the taste of dust women are kicking up if these figures and forecasts hold true. Speaking of worthless men, Rush Limbaugh (2) opened his mouth again, and [REDACTED]. In other men news, have you heard about this mess brewing in California with the 41-year-old teacher (3) leaving his family and shacking up with his 18-year-old former student?? It’s really not the age difference that bothers me. It’s not even the student-teacher thing. This isn’t the first time nor will it be the last time that has happened. What bothers me is the fact that this man left his wife and kids to live with an 18-year-old. Furthermore, his oldest daughter is 17. #awkward These two can call this love and say they’re following their hearts all they want, but if I let my 18-year-old heart make these kinds of decisions, I’d hope someone would knock me upside my 18-year-old head. I want an update on this story in 6 months. I don’t see it lasting much longer than that.

It’s been a tough year for Peyton Manning (4) fans, hasn’t it? He misses the entire season, has 4 neck operations, the Colts enter the doldrums of the NFL, and have now decided to proceed without him. If I’ve learned nothing else about professional sports leagues and franchises, I have learned that business is business. Owners and GM’s are in the business of winning games and championships. It’s as simple as that. Players that spend their entire careers with one team are a rare breed and an endangered species. I applaud Peyton Manning and Jim Irsay for the class they displayed during the press conference. Class is a word I can’t use to describe this Bountygate (5) situation, though. It just won’t go away, and it annoys me more every day. Forgive me for not being surprised or outraged by the fact that someone was paying defensive players to deliver big hits and injure players. Don’t high school and college kids get helmet stickers for this kind of thing? Don’t we love watching brave receivers go up the middle only to get leveled by big, bad safeties? Don’t we get a kick out of watching videos like this? No? Okay, maybe that’s just me then. I’m not condoning this practice, but I’m not at all surprised by it. I remember when I was in the eighth grade and laid out a kid, and got accolades for it. Practice! He was a teammate. I think I just knocked the wind out of him, but people were lauding my efforts while he was still rolling around on the ground. This culture has been built over the years. I figured it was just a matter of time before someone put some money on it. I don’t like it; it’s cheap (figuratively speaking), but it makes sense. We get excited and replay a violent collision on our DVRs when we see a big hit followed by a guy who doesn’t get up. Now people act like this bounty thing is reprehensible? I won’t lie, once I found out the amount guys would get for a hit/injury (except for the bounty for Brett Favre), my initial thought was, “That’s it?” We’re talking millionaires here. My opinion.

I would say she looks good...sexy, if you will.

I don’t pretend to be the biggest NASCAR fan, but Danica Patrick (6) tends to intrigue me from time to time. It’s nice to look at her. However, she doesn’t take too kindly to being called “sexy” anymore. Oh. Well, excuse us, Mrs. Patrick. Your driving prowess and record of winning races don’t seem to be making news. Maybe because…YOU HAVEN’T WON ANYTHING! Yet you stay relevant. I keep seeing you scantily clad in GoDaddy.com commercials and swimsuit issues. I googled Mrs. Patrick, and this is what came up. “Pretty” isn’t the word I would use to describe the vast majority of those pictures. So, she doesn’t want to be called sexy? Then chill with the sexy pictures!

Ladies, I need your help. I have been a victim! I have had to replace more Jordan shorts (7) than I care to remember. The only reason I am bringing this up is because there have been a few conversations on my Twitter timeline about women’s need to take their man’s Jordan shorts and not give them back. I’ve also talked to quite a few women who proudly brag about their collection of Jordan shorts. I’ve even heard them called “trophies.” Why??? Those are not cheap! I mean, it’s cute and everything, but what is the fascination here? Is it merely comfort or is it more of a psychological thing? Please advise.

Big K.R.I.T. (8) dropped his third mixtape, “4eva N A Day”, on Monday. I’ve been a fan since the first time I listened to “K.R.I.T. Wuz Here”. I loved “Return of 4eva”. This effort, however, left some things to be desired. He stays true to his smooth, Southern sound, but there just weren’t many standout tracks to me outside of “Red Eye.” It’s a solid listen, but I wasn’t hitting repeat as many times as I did on his previous two mixtapes.  Like MichaelYoungHistory pointed out, the album is supposed to drop in June, so these probably aren’t the best songs we’ll hear from K.R.I.T. I hope he’s right.

As the regular thREADERS know, I am a proud Longhorn (and Knight). Needless to say, Sallie Mae (9) and I are in a toxic, tumultuous, long-term relationship. I found this video that provides a comical and realistic view into such a relationship.  Yeah, that about sums it up. More light was shed on the affirmative action/holistic review/race in admissions issue at Texas (10) that I wrote about a few weeks ago. Here’s an interesting article that provides an inside look into what’s going on in Austin. It also sparked some interesting debate and discussion.

Texas. Dallas, Texas. My hometown got another show. Not Dallas, not SWAT, not First 48, not Top Chef: Texas, not Storage Wars: Texas. This one appears to be on some Stepford Wives-type ish. “Good Christian Bitches Belles – GCB (11). WTF? I refuse to watch this show, but based on what I’ve read, it reminds me of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills/Orange County. FOH! How many damn “wives” shows do we need? OMG. Desperate Housewives wasn’t enough? Basketball Wives isn’t enough? Mob Wives? SMH. I’m hoping the ratings force ABC to divorce such poppycock. LOL.

On a more solemn note, #Kony2012 (12) entered my life on Monday through social media, and I must say that I’m very moved, saddened, and frustrated. For those curious or unaware, here is a link that details Jason Russell, Invisible Children, Joseph Kony, the sex slave trade, and the documentary itself. Here is the documentary, Kony 2012.

Finally, over on the Thread, we’ve been discussing a weekly radio show (13) for our friends, thREADERS, Twitter followers (@TheThreadBlog), etc. There are about 20 of us, and we’ve had a 5 year running conversation (hence the name, The Thread). Why not further open the doors to you? The idea spawned from a few friends of ours who have started their own radio show. We’re just looking for a different and interactive way to reach the hundreds of people who have supported us here. We’re not abandoning the ThreadBlog; we’re just trying to experiment with another avenue. Let us know your thoughts.

-23

 

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MILK & HONEY never tasted so good!

Think of I Want to Work with Diddy mixed with Baldwin Hills with an updated A Different World on the side. We all, whether we’re ready to admit it or not, watch these shows for various different reasons, but they all have one thing in common. They show young black people progressing. Now imagine the good that all of these shows have all rolled up in one. I don’t know about y’all, but that’s my dream show, and if we work hard, it just might come true in the near future!!!  Read the rest of this entry »

 

Single Ladies that are not quite “Living Single”

I heard about this show about two years ago when a producer I use to intern for mentioned the new project she was working on. She described it as a Sex in the City set in Atlanta featuring black women. Interesting and exciting, huh? Maybe. Then, I didn’t hear about it until the week before its premiere. There could be a blog within itself asking the question why this show wasn’t promoted much, but I don’t want to go off on a tangent.

I write this blog fresh from watching the premiere. I tried to wait, but my laptop sat at my feet calling my name. The feeling from the ending, and throughout the entire show, still lingers. A feeling of … confusion. For some reason, I’m extremely unsure about this show. I really don’t know how I feel about this show just yet. I want to see how it’s going to develop.  But for some reason, I really want to like it!

First, two hours was just too long. It felt more like an under developed movie than a television show premiere. It had its moments, but it became taxing to watch. I kept looking to see how much time was left, and it started after the first 30 minutes of the show. That’s never a good feeling to have. I also almost turned it off about 20 minutes before its end. Hopefully the hour-long episodes won’t be so bad.

Secondly, it was an overload… of everything. I feel drained after watching that show. The pilot was just too much too fast. It was a whole season of drama within one episode. Ask anyone, I love my fair share of drama, so when I say it’s too much, then it’s too much. I think I would have been more interested if I had time to be invested in the characters (and that the key tool in a sitcom). There was so much drama, I was desensitized by the end of the show, and I didn’t care what happened.

With all the drama and the loooooong premiere episode, the resolution became cheesy. I cannot argue that they have some great set ups, but I’m kind of disappointed that so much happened so soon. There was heavy drama within the first two minutes. Why so soon? Reel me in, please! Then reveal. If you give me drama before I care about the character, the drama makes me roll my eyes and say “Get over yourself”. The great thing about a television show is that you have time to play with a lot of things. As much as I want them to keep up the stakes, I’m a little frightened of the drama overload. After all of that, the only reason I want to come back next week is to see how they handle an hour.

I also fee like they drummed the “single ladies” theme into our head. Okay, I get that the show is supposed to be about single ladies. I got that from the title, but do it subtly.  Living Single was about living single, but you weren’t always reminded. As a (newly) single woman, I don’t want to keep being reminded that I’m single. I want to subconsciously connect to the trials and tribulations of the single life.

As much as I want to like this show, it just seems… overdone. I feel like they’re trying to hard, and that’s an extra turn off. There were some good moments and nice story set ups, but it didn’t wow me. And a pilot is supposed to wow me, so I will come back next week. Yes, I may be coming back next week, but I don’t have high hopes. I’m waiting on them to prove to me that I’m wrong. I’m charging the problems up to the too long series premiere. I guess I can equate this feeling to when I watch Love That Girl and Let’s Stay Together watching the next episode hoping it will be good, and both of those shows are womp! I’m ready to support, so I hope there’s something to support.

 

For (All) My Single Ladies

Remember when I said that Love Jones meant the world to me?  The spoken word displayed in that movie made me fall in love with the art.  I now give you this.  This woman absolutely blew me away with her words.  As a man, it makes me look within myself to assess my patience.  This isn’t about me and my thoughts, though.  The floor belongs to Janette.  Just watch, enjoy, be amazed, and be blessed.  Feel free to comment as well.

“I will no longer get weighted down from so-called friends and family talks about the concern for my biological clock when I serve the author of time…” *furious finger snaps*

Shout out to fellow Threader, fnasty, for uncovering this gem.

-23

 
3 Comments

Posted by on March 5, 2011 in For The Ladies, Relationships

 

Say Something Baby

“I can’t find a good man”

I detest these words with a passion.  Whenever I hear a grown woman complain about her potential mates I punch a small woodland creature in my mind. I understand that there are millions of “jerks” and “dogs” in the world, I also understand that women are often approached in a way that is totally inappropriate but what I don’t understand is how these facts translate into you not being able to find a good man. Let’s look at this logically.

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