Confessions of a Cold-Hearted Convert: Cupid’s Chokehold

February 14. The 45th day of the year. One of the most divisive and polarizing days on the calendar. It’s Valentine’s Day. Single Awareness Day. For the veteran thREADERS, you are familiar with my sentiments pertaining to this capitalistic Hallmark holiday. If you’re not or don’t remember, acquaint or reacquaint yourself.

Cliffs’ Notes
5 reasons Valentine’s Day sucks:
1. It is a convoluted and sexist holiday built on the back of capitalism
2. Too much pressure (generally on the man)
3. Too much emphasis placed on one day
4. It’s a polarizing day
5. “The by-product of Reason 1 is glorified prostitution.”

There you have it, folks. My bold, brazen, and brash views on Valentine’s Day……………..in 2011. It’s 2012 now, and the world may very well be coming to an end because I honestly don’t feel that way anymore. I looked back at that post a few weeks ago and cringed. Reading between the lines of the very thing I wrote revealed a bitter person in 2011. I’d like to think I’ve grown up a bit since then.

Now, to my single people, don’t think I’ve just gone off and abandoned you. No, I still think Valentine’s Day is extremely superficial, polarizing, and we all might be better off without it. I’m simply saying that I’ve been rehabilitated. My utter disdain and loathing of February 14 just isn’t there anymore. I went out of my way to proclaim how much I hated it. I offended people…on purpose. I came up with theories worthy of a dissertation specifically outlining why Valentine’s Day was God-awful. Hell, I wore straight black on V-Day last year (black suit, black shirt, black tie, black shoes, black watch)…to prove an eventual moot point.

At the end of the day, all the reactive convictions I had toward V-Day did nothing but make me feel worse and expose me. Now I didn’t go into Hallmark this year and try to make up for lost time by buying up any and everything red, white, or pink. I didn’t go to every neighborhood florist and buy up their supply of efflorescence. I didn’t go to the grocery store and tithe to Russel Stover. I’m still in remission over here. I’ll just say that I’ve come a very long way in a year.

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